iKiInsight

Overwhelmed. Delegate.

Wed, 23 May 2012 02:48:00 GMT

Today's blog is largely taken from my good friend Patrick Moore's book "Touch the Sky" which we'll soon have available as an ebook. If you want to know more about Patrick check out his website One Billion Punches

There's an old saying; "If you want something done properly, do it yourself" There's no doubt that in some cases this is true. However, someone else said; "I have so much to do, that I'm going to bed" Sometimes, life can be so overwhelming we just want to stop.

Doing things yourself is often the best strategy, but getting some help is not a sign of weakness. If you can't get everything done it may simply mean you've got too much to do, or that you are trying to do things you just don't have the skills or aptitude for.

So delegate. Sometimes it's poor management to do everything ourselves. Sometimes it's much more efficient to focus on the things we do well and get help with the stuff we dislike, or aren't so good at. Smart companies get extra staff when there's too much work to do or when they need specialist services. So should we.

There are times it can be a good idea to get someone else do a task for us because it is empowering for them. Remember the old adage, "Give as person a fish and they eat for a day, teach them to fish and they eat for life".

There are other times people really want to help, for any number of reasons. If they offer, let them do it. If they don't offer, ask them. Or hire someone. An occasional baby-sitter, cleaner, gardener or ironing helper can be a gift from heaven.

Don't forget to get your free download Every Single Day

Go on. Delegate today.

Peace of Mind. Every Single Day.

Fri, 18 May 2012 02:34:00 GMT

Firstly, my apologies for the two week break since the last blog, and secondly thanks to those people who responded to the suggestion we find a way to encourage more people to talk publicly about how they manage and overcome depression. I've posted several of these and will discuss it further soon.

Today's blog addresses the issue obliquely;

It seems to be a part of human nature to continually strive to improve ourselves one way or another. Unfortunately for our peace of mind we are designed to rarely be satisfied for very long. I'm sure most of us have experienced the old pattern; the new couch soon needs a new coffee table, which needs a newly decorated room...soon we're talking a whole new house...

So much so, that the whole focus of sections of our communities and government is to foster continuous growth. Without it we face recession or depression with the resultant job loss and pain....

Fortunately, as we know, there are other ways to satisfy our yearning for improvement that don't require continuous "consumption" of services and products ---art, sport, education,music, hobbies and all sorts of personal growth strategies.

Just to throw something a little different into the mix, I'm launching a little project right here, right now. It's totally free and goes like this. Each week I'll send a Power Word, a short explanation of how to use it and encourage you to do something about it that day. It really works for me, (when I do it) and can be fun for all the family. Seriously. And it costs nothing but a little thought.

This weeks' word is "Communicate". I've always believed that half of the worlds' problems would just go away if we made more effort to talk calmly, clearly and thoughtfully. Today, communicate clearly to someone. Tell them something that's been on your mind or that will help them in some way. Before you do, be sure to think clearly about the outcome. If the result will be good, do it.

Did I mention it starts with a song? This song has lots of Power Words and it's free. It's called Every Single Day

How Can We Start a More Open Conversation About Depression?

Wed, 23 May 2012 09:36:00 GMT

I attended an excellent presentation on depression given by Lisa Champion at the Filex Fitness Convention recently. The focus was on how helpful exercise can be in the management/healing process. A theme also touched on was the benefit many sufferers report from hearing other people talk about their experiences in dealing with the condition. There is no doubt that this can help them feel less alone and to see that there actually is hope.

However, we all know that depression is still commonly a taboo topic that many people are reluctant to admit to, or discuss, particularly in public.

Even though 20% of the population are afflicted at some time in their lives and that it is spread among all levels of society, the term “mental illness” is shameful.

While there is no doubt progress is being made – (those over 65 barely can talk about it at all) I would like to suggest we can learn something for the example of gays “coming out.” Although there is still debate over elements of gay rights there is no debate that the example of prominent and respected people ‘coming out of the closet’ has helped alleviate the fear, isolation and shame experienced by many gay people.

Is it time we invented a tag, a euphemism, for “coming out” about having personally experienced depression? We know that many suffering in isolation will benefit and I think the person “walking the dog’ will benefit as well.

Maybe that term can work? Walking the black dog in public can have many benefits. Both sufferer and dog get some healthy exercise, the dog is exposed as being not as mean and ugly as thought and others will be encouraged to walk their dog as well, with better health all around.

Declutter for Charity and Clarity

Thu, 26 Apr 2012 01:37:00 GMT

Easter is over and a new school term stretches out before us. There's a real chill in the air that tells us Autumn has set in and that Winter is on the way. Time to put away our summer things and get out the winter wardrobe. I'm not a great fan of cold weather but always look forward to the change of seasons because it puts me in the mood to do a De-clutter.

Yes, on some levels it's a great excuse to focus on something other than work;- a distraction if you will. On the other hand I think it's always worthwhile to tidy the desk, clear the decks and bring new energy into life. In many Asian cultures there is a strong belief in the power of Feng Shui and I believe there is a lot of sense in it. Keeping your environment clean and pleasant makes it easier to stay happy, healthy and strong..

It's been especially easy to do a major clean up as son Scott is home for a visit. As he is now calling Canada home he finally acknowledges it is time to clear out his "stuff". He's organising a garage sale so Carol and I are taking the opportunity to get rid of things we haven't used in a long time. We can no longer use the excuse "it may come in handy....."

What doesn't go to a new owner at the Garage sale will go to Vinnies or the Red Cross, to someone who will find it handy. What they don't want will go on the kerb...it 's amazing how fast some things disappear on the street. One man's trash is another man's treasure.

It's chaos at home at the moment but energising, as I know everything will feel so much better when all that old stuff has been moved on, the Feng Shui is flowing and I'll have no more excuses to put off work that needs to be done.

How do we create safer, more equitable communities that respect the rights of all?

Thu, 26 Apr 2012 05:42:00 GMT

Here's an interesting question. "Why have the western nations been able to develop advanced, relatively equitable, rich economies and safe, healthy communities, where the rights of citizens are respected, while much of the rest of the world has lagged?' Richard Woolcott, Australian Ambassador to the UN in the 1990s has an interesting answer;- Sport. Specifically, sports with codified structures and rules. He made the point that the great world sports such as cricket, rugby, soccer, boxing, baseball, basket ball, tennis and more, were developed in England and the US in the last several centuries and coincided with the rapid social and economic development in these countries. He maintains that the sporting concepts of teamwork, strategy and the rule of law are key.

I believe it's arguable that some of our current social problems stem from a lack of consistent, fair rules in our schools and communities. Since the late 1960s there has been a powerful trend to make allowances for anti-social or inappropriate behaviors when the perpetrators have "extenuating circumstances" While I believe it is definitely the right thing to "cut some slack" when poor behavior is influenced by circumstances beyond their control, such as the individual who lives in a difficult home environment, I also believe this compassion can be inappropriately applied. Most of us can think of situations in which the rights of the the "criminal" seem to outweigh the rights of the "victims," when extenuating circumstances are cited.

So how do we reconcile the rights of individuals, whilst being tolerant of different tastes, preferences and circumstances, and still exercise consideration and compassionate for the less fortunate? In other words, how do we balance the rights of one individual with the responsibility to respect the rights of others at the same time?

In a school environment, a core problem is that many teachers have slightly different expectations and use different language to define expected behavior, with the result that students, teachers and parents are often unclear as to what and where boundaries are and what the consequences are if they are broken.

As a starting point I offer "Context Appropriate Behavior" The phrase is easily understood by asking;- What is appropriate on a football field? The answer;- Running aggressively and loudly, tackling violently, throwing, kicking, competing. What then, is inappropriate in this context? Fighting, dangerous tackling, swearing and various other "unsportsmanlike" behaviors. On a sporting field, the consequences of inappropriate behaviors are clear, consistent and impartial. Everybody understands that the rules exist and are applied so that the game is as safe, fair and fun as possible for all participants. It is also understood that, while some players may be more skilled or fitter than others, at least they are all on a "level playing field"

I believe this concept can be a useful starting point in discussing rules in all situations that involve groups of people. It provides a language framework that fosters a clear understanding of how we should act and why. It also provides a clear answer as to where life circumstances are relevant - or not. For example, in a school class context, clear rules allow all students to learn in a safe, respectful environment. For example, Yes, some students may have less than ideal home lives or other behavior or learning difficulties, but that does not give them the right to distract or threaten others. We certainly should allocate whatever resources are available to assist, but isn't it the responsibility of our society to teach that in certain contexts, the rules are the rules and that they are there for the benefit of all. The dangerous tackle rule on the football field protects the safety all players equally, just as the don't speak when a nominated person is talking rule respects the right to be heard, and to hear, of all participants in a class.

Clear, consistent, rules, and clear consistent language equals, safe, fair and fun for everyone.

How we react to life is up to us.

Fri, 30 Mar 2012 04:13:00 GMT

This is an issue that for me is very close to home. I'm inclined to being a perfectionist and sometimes (OK regularly) catch myself stressing on the things that are less than perfect, rather than what is great. And sometimes I catch myself blaming others...

I know that any blokes that read this are going to be horrified when I quote my wife extensively on this issue, and maybe even more when I say she is right!! I'm also guessing she was aiming this fair and square at me. Here is what she said;-

"If someone gives you a gift and you refuse to take it, who does the gift belong to? If someone throws you a ball do you have to catch it? We don't have to accept negativity from others. We mistakenly believe that we have to believe other peoples points of view, but ultimately we have a choice. If we believe everything that is said or done to us we are giving away our power. Sometimes we blame others for what they have said or done, to make ourselves feel justified in holding onto resentment and bitterness. Ultimately we are all responsible for our own happiness, and what we will accept from others or what to let bounce off like water off a ducks back. The opinions of others are just that...opinions. We don't have to buy into them. No-one is perfect, we all make mistakes, we all hurt others and are hurt by others. We are not responsible for the words or actions of others, but we can choose how we react to them. We can find peace in a raging storm. Happiness in a prison cell, strength in a disaster. All that we need is within us NOW. I have a choice whether to react or respond to life, and so do you.

Can't argue with that! But I also know that I'm right sometimes as well. How's that for the last word. Have a great day everyone.

Easter. A time for hope and rebirth.

Wed, 04 Apr 2012 05:08:00 GMT

Thanks to all of those people who responded to the last blog. Kerry Smith said that the Family & Carer Mental Health Program do Well-being Workshops for Carers that we may be able to access.

Captain Andrew Welch highlighted the problem in the armed forces. He related how one of his roles was to farewell the bodies of soldier killed lin Afghanistan, as they were shipped home.

"Kerri-Ann ([partner]) was one of the first ones to receive the body at the other end of that long flight, and she stood with the families and shared their grief. I received the briefs and screens to make sure the scars weren't too deep (they were) but all KA had was me, when I got home."

The problem is widespread and if anything is growing. Our society is so very focused on happiness, fulfillment and perfection but the message is overwhelmingly that "a new car, a bigger TV, more clothes" is the key to that happiness.

New things do make us feel good, but only for a little while.. and then we need more!
My cousin Louise, who works in a Social Health role, sent in this quote:

"This tool, our body, is given to us for only a short time: this life.

On the day that you were born, you began to die. Do not waste a single moment more!

If you do not make good use of this free and precious life, what good does it do to possess a human body?

You see, we are all dying. It’s only a matter of time. Some of us just die sooner than others.

Every individual in the world has a unique contribution.

The true essence of humankind is kindness. There are other qualities which come from education or knowledge, but it is essential, if one wishes to be a genuine human being and impart satisfying meaning to one’s existence, to have a good heart.

Let us try to recognize the precious nature of each day.

Impermanence is a principle of harmony. When we don’t struggle against it, we are in harmony with reality. To diminish the suffering of pain, we need to make a crucial distinction between the pain of pain, and the pain we create by our thoughts about the pain. Fear, anger, guilt, loneliness and helplessness are all mental and emotional responses that can intensify pain.

It seems that often when problems arise, our outlook becomes narrow"

I'm sure we all know that the REAL secret to peace of mind is kindness and love, but we also know how difficult that can be to remember whilst in the midst of the daily grind.

Easter is symbolically a time of rebirth and renewal, of new chances and fresh starts. I'm going to set some time aside this Easter to count my blessings, catch up with friends and do a little dreaming about a better future. And eat some chocolate.

Happy Healthy Strong Easter everyone.

How do we help the helpers?

Fri, 30 Mar 2012 04:14:00 GMT

I was deeply saddened yesterday to hear of Bec Schofield ending her life last Wednesday evening. I have had the great pleasure of working with Bec a number of times over the past 4 or 5 years and was looking forward to working with her again next term. She was such an energetic, 'can do', positive person to work with, who had a powerful impact on the lives of a lot of young people.

I acknowledge that I don't know all of the things that were going on in Bec's life, but can't help wondering if there isn't something more we can do to help people suffering unbearable stress in their lives. The special programs industry that Bec was a part of is a huge one these days and I don't doubt that many people working in the field find it very wearing. Though rewards come form helping people, it can be a frustrating and draining experience, particularly given the many beaurocratic

Gratitude is it's own reward.

Thu, 22 Mar 2012 02:10:00 GMT

Firstly thanks to all those people who commented on my previous blogs, I'm really grateful for your feedback. One in particular was so energising I want to share it with you.
Beth Shea emailed this.
"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past; brings peace for today and creates vision for tomorrow."
Melody Beattie (from Simple Truth)
In our busy, stressful, everyday lives it can be all too easy to focus on the negatives. In fact, because we learn most of our lessons by making mistakes;- "Oh, I got that wrong, I need to do it this way next time" that it's often difficult not to get into an habitually negative mindset. How many of us have had the experience of completing a task, only to have a colleague, or worst, a family member, glance at our efforts and immediately point out the faults, neglecting to mention, let alone praise, some of the good points? This has certainly happened to me and I must admit I've been guilty of it too!
Yes, we were "just trying to help" but could we have done it better?

Let's take a moment to think of someone we are grateful to. Why not even go and say something nice, or send a text? Go on, just do it.

Feels good huh!

And let's not forget we do it to ourselves as well. How often do we beat ourselves up over something we are doing less than brilliantly and overlook the things we are doing a great job at?
Let's stop right now and be grateful for something we did well. Good on us!
Sadly, I am going to end today's post on a tragic note. Ellen Lawler died unexpectedly early on Tuesday morning from a brain aneurism. Among many other things Ellen was a caring and dedicated school teacher who went out of her way to have a wonderful impact on my Grandson, Cooper, as well as many other Dubbo schoolchildren.
She will be grieviously missed by her husband Tony and 4 children, as well as many, many friends, family, colleagues and acquaintances.
I am truly grateful to have know her.

Let's look at where we are...and count our blessings..

Thu, 08 Mar 2012 04:42:00 GMT

I know that for many people 2011 was a challenging year and that 2012 is shaping up to be even more so. Lot's of things seem to be in chaos;- the weather is unusual, the political situation is unstable to say the least and lets not forget the whole financial crisis that just keeps on looming.

There's little doubt that all this uncertainty can create even more stress in our personal lives and it can be difficult to see the good things amidst all the gloom. That's why I'm going to take time each week to sit down and discuss ways we are so very fortunate. Yes, we have problems, but life has always been like that. Remember the old saying "life wasn't meant to be easy"

But we have a lot to be thankful for. I think it's worthwhile to take a moment to remind ourselves how very lucky we are to live in such a safe, healthy country as is Australia;- No terrorists, no roadside bombs, no politicians who will put you in jail if you don't vote for them. We take these things for granted but for billions of people it's a dream.

I'm really grateful I'm an Aussie. I hope you are too. Have a great weekend.

Website Feedback

Wed, 16 Mar 2011 14:19:00 GMT

Here is your chance to tell us what you want to see on the iKiFit website.

We are making some pretty hefty changes - navigational, graphics, content, etc.

So leave a comment below on what you want to see, or what changes you think can improve how you move through the website.

We value your contribution, so start typing now. Let us know what you think.

Stay Happy Healthy Strong!

Testimonials

Wed, 16 Mar 2011 14:11:00 GMT

iKiFit is empowering and equipping many regional NSW schools. Below we let the principals of these schools do the talking for us. It's a privilege to work alongside talented and respected educators, and to know that together we are making a difference.

Anthony O’Leary, Principal St John’s Primary School, Dubbo

I have had the privilege of being involved with the iKiFit program over a number of years. I have found the program to be of the highest quality. The program is unique in that it provides for high quality teacher professional development, amazing dance routines, fitness development and strategies to develop positive behaviour. The students have been totally engaged with the high-energy music and iKiFit skills.

iKiFit has added to the quality of our school sport programme. iKiFit has provided instructors that are experienced and knowledgeable in their field. Their ability to communicate appropriately and manage our primary aged children has been excellent.

I would recommend the iKiFit program as the premier product that is holistic in its approach to overall fitness and wellness.

Darryl Thompson, Principal Wellington Public School, Wellington

The introduction of iKi at our school has been a significant contributor to improved learning outcomes for all of our students. As a program it has allow three very important aspects of our school to flourish:

1. Our iKi Crew have been provided with quality leadership training. All have grown personally and their support of younger students in mentor roles has reduced the incidence of poor behaviour by more than 50%.

2. The tenants of the iKiFit program are now integrated into the school's behaviour policy. Each day our students pledge to Be Learners (If you look and listen you will learn), Be Respectful (I'm OK you're OK) and the Be Safe (No Play, No Play).

3. As a program the fitness and coordination aspects cannot be understated.

The program for our school addresses many of the physical activity components of the PDHPE syllabus and keeps children active through structured routines and exercises.

The professional approach adopted by the iKiFit team have allowed us to build an engaged, collaborative and focused culture in both the playground and classrooms across the whole school.

Dan Williams, Deputy Principal St Joseph’s Primary School, Walgett

The iKiFit program has been running in our school for almost 4 years. Our school has adopted a whole-school approach to delivering the iKiFit program. As the Year 6 teacher, I have also personally found great value in the iKiFit program on so many levels:

Physical Health benefits. Obviously, the core fitness (dance) component of iKiFit delivers a high-energy, convenient and engaging way to involve students in cardiovascular movement.

Motivation & enthusiasm in class. My students consistently look forward to our iKiFit sessions, and are very disappointed on occasions that we miss or cancel our daily workout.

Leadership. The iKiCrew initiative has identified and encourage a wide variety of students to take on leadership roles – particularly indigenous students, and students who do not usually ‘fit the mould’ of traditional school leaders (for example, that of a School Captain or SRC Captain).

Self-esteem and confidence. I have found that iKiFit empowers students, and helps them to feel better about themselves and their abilities. Many students, who do not usually excel or apply themselves in class, often excel and apply themselves fully during iKiFit.

Goal setting. I have had numerous students – predominately indigenous – who have aspirations to become iKiFit instructors when they are older. They have really taken to the program and what it stands for.

Teaching Our Kids

Thu, 26 May 2011 02:46:00 GMT

Battling along as parents is enduring and often unrewarding. When we think we have our kids worked out, they throw another log in the middle of the road for us to trip up on. Parenting can be exhausting and lonely at times, as in protection of our family we often feel that we can't express our concerns to others.

I've been thinking a lot about how to be a good parent recently. It's heart wrenching when your five year old son's teacher calls you in to chat about his "wayward behaviour", and real cause to address what is going on with this child. It seems his mother - yes me - needed to have a look at how she was parenting, and discovered a few hard truths.

Remember the old saying, "do as I say, not as I do"? I've determined that just doesn't work. Well I guess if you take into the account their new found love of swearing, then it actually does work. It's hard to scold your child for their slip of the tongue when five minutes earlier the same word fell out of your mouth. I tentatively put my hand up in admittance to this crime. Explaining that adults sometimes use "naughty words" doesn't quite cut it with a five year old. So what I learnt in a not so pleasant way, is if we as parents don't live what we preach, our words will fall on deaf ears and possibly create rebellious hearts. It is vital we impress our principles and values on our kids, and talk genuinely about them. Our kids won't catch the truth by osmosis. We have to talk, and not in monotones that they'll tune out, but in natural language, at natural times and in natural ways. Like when you're kicking the ball around the back yard, reading a book or eating dinner. Even while indulging in some iKiFit!

Unless there was an instruction manual that I missed out on at child birth, it's pretty certain we will make mistakes along our parenthood road. Kids are kids. We create boundaries, they test them.. and test them and test them. But kids are resilient, and we just have to be consistent and fair in our discipline, teach our principles and overall let them know we love them.

Equipping our kids is tough work, especially when we're not perfect ourselves. But I think as long as we're genuine about what we believe in, our morals, and in teaching right from wrong, our kids will be empowered to be the best they can be.

- Thoughts by Honorable Hayley (iKi Team Member)

iKiCrew

Sat, 05 Feb 2011 12:27:00 GMT

iKiFit PARTNERS WITH HOUSING NSW BUILDING STRONGER COMMUNITIES TO DEVELOP iKiCREW
- from September 2010

iKiFit will develop, manage and implement training, capacity building, development, mentoring and leadership for 12 identified social housing residents from the Dubbo area. This is an exciting project that will see an opportunity for our youth to gain employment as instructors with iKiFit, as well as enhance confidence and skill levels.

As a result of support and funding provided by Housing NSW Building Stronger Communities, iKiFit will be targeting individuals aged 16 and 25, with an emphasis on Aboriginal and social housing residents.

iKiFit is seeking the assistance of local high schools, as well as employment and service providers, in promoting the project to our target group. We will provide demonstration days, workshops and mentors to encourage individuals to become participants in the iKi Crew project.

The iKi Crew project will initially run over a seven-month period in which participants will undergo intensive training and refining of skills, and will be able to identify appropriate certification training in line with this.

iKiFit provides fitness, wellness, mentoring and behaviour management designed specifically for our youth. iKiFit combines elements of martial arts, dance, and aerobics to create an interactive fitness program that equips and enables. We are thrilled to be able to partner with Housing NSW Building Stronger Communities to develop our unique iKi Crew program. The ultimate aim is to empower our youth with employable skill sets, and the capacity to obtain employment.

Happiness is a Habit ... Part I

Tue, 14 Dec 2010 02:16:00 GMT

Two Dingos
One evening an aboriginal elder told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.
He said, "My son, the battle is between two dingos that live inside us all.
"One is Evil - it is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority and ego.
"The other is Good - it is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which one wins?"
The grandfather replied simply, "the one you feed."
Sing your own Song, and take responsibility for your own happiness. The two dingos do live in all of us, and we all face the ongoing struggle everyday of which dingo we will feed. It is sometimes easier to feed the evil dingo by our thoughtless actions and unrealistic desires. Food for the Good Dingo can be more obscure, so there are times when this dingo gets a little hungry.
We need to peel back the veil that prohibits us from seeing beyond our self and look further than the neighbor's new car. Yes, food for Good is stopping to help an elderly woman cross the street, listening to your child, cleaning the house, preparing a meal with your loved ones, feeling the rain on your face after years of drought, the sun rising in the morning. Good is not just doing what is moral, it is as the cliche states; "stopping and smelling the roses." Take a deep breath, appreciate the small things, and remember that happiness is found within you, not outside you.
Here's some food for Good. Smile. Smile today, because it is a gift worth giving, and a gift that keeps on giving back.